PERMISSIBLE
RENDERING A DIFFERING OPINION
At times, you as a parent, and the most major stakeholder in the athlete's endeavor, will have an opinion that is in conflict with the coach, the club, the league, or other stakeholders serving on behalf of your child. The WSA Way permits alternative opinions. The WSA Way facilitates positive discourse that is solution-oriented.
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DISSENT: The expression or holding of opinions at variance with those previously, commonly or officially held.
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VS
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NOT PERMISSIBLE DISSENSION: Disagreement; partisan and contentious quarreling, causing conflict, discord, strife.
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While you may "dissent" with an opinion, it is important to not permit this dissent to become "dissension" within the team, club or league. The WSA Way requires all stakeholders to take the position of "solution seekers".
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URGENT & DIRE Urgent and Dire situations are those in which a player and potentially others are in imminent harm's way. This requires immediate attention, usually reporting to local authorities, and immediate suspension of team activities. Safety is the #1 Priority.
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INCONVENIENT Inconvenient or frustrating situations, such as playing time, favoritism, misconduct that is connected to negative coaching, irresponsible planning or scheduling, lack of wherewithal to carry out expected duties, then this is considered a matter of inconvenience. This matter should be addressed rationally, through a process towards remediation within The WSA Way "growth mindset" culture.
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MISTAKES COMMON TO PARENT DISCERNMENT of "URGENT & DIRE" vs "INCONVENIENT" SITUATIONS:
It is a mistake to regard an "inconvenient" matter as an "urgent and dire" matter. The reason this does not abide by The WSA Way is that ration is required for remediation, which requires listening, understanding, and time. Attention to Urgent and Dire situations occupies bandwidth and focus, deservedly so, and requires immediate action, without applying much time to ration. It is important for the parent to discern if the situation is URGENT & DIRE to ensure we do not inadvertently occupy useful resources that are meant to focus on a community of athletes. Ambitious missions require focus and proper process. Likewise it would be a mistake to regard an "urgent and dire" matter as "inconvenient". In an "urgent and dire" matter, time is of the essence in protecting and ensuring athlete safety.
This is not an "either-or" scenario, or an "all-or-nothing" evaluation. There are myriads of circumstances, some predictable, and some that will arise unpredictably as outliers and anomalies to the norms. There are situations that will be neither URGENT & DIRE nor simply INCONVENIENT or FRUSTRATING. You might encounter sustained frustration, which leads to unbearable or intolerable circumstances. It is important to note that a situation that becomes UNBEARABLE or INTOLERABLE should have been met with multiple efforts at remedy through intervention prior to reaching the "unbearable/intolerable" threshold. This keeps with The WSA Way of embracing GROWTH MINDSET and SOLUTION-ORIENTED efforts towards all challenges.
It is a mistake to regard an "inconvenient" matter as an "urgent and dire" matter. The reason this does not abide by The WSA Way is that ration is required for remediation, which requires listening, understanding, and time. Attention to Urgent and Dire situations occupies bandwidth and focus, deservedly so, and requires immediate action, without applying much time to ration. It is important for the parent to discern if the situation is URGENT & DIRE to ensure we do not inadvertently occupy useful resources that are meant to focus on a community of athletes. Ambitious missions require focus and proper process. Likewise it would be a mistake to regard an "urgent and dire" matter as "inconvenient". In an "urgent and dire" matter, time is of the essence in protecting and ensuring athlete safety.
This is not an "either-or" scenario, or an "all-or-nothing" evaluation. There are myriads of circumstances, some predictable, and some that will arise unpredictably as outliers and anomalies to the norms. There are situations that will be neither URGENT & DIRE nor simply INCONVENIENT or FRUSTRATING. You might encounter sustained frustration, which leads to unbearable or intolerable circumstances. It is important to note that a situation that becomes UNBEARABLE or INTOLERABLE should have been met with multiple efforts at remedy through intervention prior to reaching the "unbearable/intolerable" threshold. This keeps with The WSA Way of embracing GROWTH MINDSET and SOLUTION-ORIENTED efforts towards all challenges.
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CHECKLIST FOR SUBMITTING YOUR OPINION |
- YOUR CHILD: Be your child's parent first. Always protect the safety of your child; emotional safety, physical safety, psychological safety. Also, be mindful to take actions that do not embarrass your child. Be sure NOT to intervene in something that your child is perfectly capable of handling and managing via your child's resilience. Be careful to not eliminate an opportunity for your child to grow through a challenge or adversity, or to practice forgiveness and mercy in the face of others' mistakes. Do NOT eliminate opportunity to BECOME through the process of adverse times in team sports.
- YOUR LANE: As expressed above it is very important to allow your child to experience the opportunities for growth within a team setting. The WSA Way encourages each of us to "play our role" within the larger team setting. A parents role is to advocate, encourage, support the athlete, and most often this includes advocating for, and supporting coach and referee, and other authority's decisions within the player environment.
- PRIVATE not PUBLIC: When offering dissent, it is important to maintain privacy on behalf of your child, the team, and your future relationship to the team dynamics. Your opinion might be founded on a great basis and require remediation. It is also possible, that your parent bias, has led to a misunderstanding instead of a truth. Rather than bring this to light publicly at first, give this process an opportunity to unfold. Then if, when, needed, the situation can be led publicly by a club director or official.
- PROTECT YOUR CHILD'S GROWTH: Be careful to not "intervene" to protect your child from a necessary uncomfortable and frictional moment of growth. Growth is not possible without tension, and progress not possible without friction. When we eliminate these from any environment we begin to advocate for mediocrity. Your child deserves the best opportunity to grow and become.
- BE A GOOD TEAMMATE: Your opinion, can become your narrative, and if you share this, which could mean you are now participating in gossip, you have created a narrative that helps shape the environment of your team. Quite simply: BUILD THE COMMUNITY YOU WANT TO BECOME A PART OF. Take responsibility for your stake in creating the environment your child participates in.
- REPORT VIA CHAINS OF COMMAND: Your first report of dissent should be to your immediate authority, your coach, and your staff. There might be reasons to bypass the coach, using a Director of Coaching, but this should be rare. The WSA Way requires a "growth mindset" which inherently leans into feedback towards solutions and growth. If the coach is skipped, then you are intentionally skipping the opportunity for remediation. If you pass information to the team manager, who is a liaison in the process, you will also miss the opportunity to ensure correct feedback gets to the coach. Certain matters may call for reporting information to the team manager.
- WHEN TO REPORT TO A TEAM MANAGER: Matters such as team finances, scheduling, or questions regarding club initiatives, directives, questions regarding league compliance, or registration administration, may go directly to a team manager who is usually privy to more information than a parent. Report "coaching matters" directly to the coach.
- It is important to not conflate reporting of feedback regarding "coaching matters" or "team leadership matters" to your team manager. For a coach to be able to resolve or work towards remediation requires you report those matters directly to the coach. The manager is not always in a position to feed information to a coach, nor is it the managers responsibility to gather "coaching" or "player" feedback and effectively communicate on another's behalf.
- It is important to not conflate reporting of feedback regarding "coaching matters" or "team leadership matters" to your team manager. For a coach to be able to resolve or work towards remediation requires you report those matters directly to the coach. The manager is not always in a position to feed information to a coach, nor is it the managers responsibility to gather "coaching" or "player" feedback and effectively communicate on another's behalf.
- WHEN TO REPORT TO A CLUB DIRECTOR: Club Directors are available if your matter has been left unresolved with a previous effort, or if you are uncertain of how to address the coach regarding the matter without a potential negative impact on your child. Expect the Director to encourage you towards communicating directly with the coach. It should be noted that if a WSA Coach were to intentionally create a negative consequence for any child, due to a parent engagement, this would be grounds for significant intervention. The coach is expected to treat EVERY CHILD ALWAYS with the highest regard in terms of value and worthiness - this is The WSA Way.
- You might also report directly to a club director if your coach serves the role of the director of your program, or if your coach has pointed you in the direction of a club director. Club Directors are also available to provide further guidance that specializes, such as college search or pro-am vertical transitions, additional training, player evaluations, and guidance on "best fit" for team or league placement.
- You might also report directly to a club director if your coach serves the role of the director of your program, or if your coach has pointed you in the direction of a club director. Club Directors are also available to provide further guidance that specializes, such as college search or pro-am vertical transitions, additional training, player evaluations, and guidance on "best fit" for team or league placement.
- COACH FEEDBACK PORTAL: Use the club's coach feedback portal to provide in depth evaluative feedback for your coach. This is posted by the club and reviewed annually by club directors.
- INCIDENT REPORT: Use the club's online incident report to supply feedback. This allows anonymous feedback.